……” When I was young I believed the world was
a huge possibility and hope, for me to achieve
everything I ever wanted.
I expected to get countless opportunities to succeed
in my life my own way.
I understood that people were nice, friendly and
caring for each other.
Unfortunately, as I grow older I am discovering
that this is not the case; and all those things I
believed in do not exist.
I now realise that the world is an inhospitable
and really rough place, where successful survival is
too hard to achieve.
I also notice that the majority of people are exactly
the opposite than what I anticipated;
being self-interested, selfish, greedy and extremely
I do not feel enthusiastic and excited anymore,
but actually disillusioned and embittered seeing all
this toxicity around me ……”
Disillusionment, a very old word since the 1600’s,
is an uncomfortable and distressing state of mind.
You feel disappointed because you have found out
that some things are not as great as you believed
them to be.
You have actually lost your faith and trust in your
hopes, goals and ideals.
You feel dissatisfied because the things you thought
as real, important, valued and pure, are not as
such any more.
Certainly it is natural for you to feel disillusioned
as you grow older, as most things you knew as a
young person are changing too fast.
I have been feeling disillusioned in recent times
with various global events and other issues — even
in my neighbourhood situations keep on changing.
Unfortunately, disillusionment is a destructive
feeling, which is not helping our life in any way.
It is sabotaging your happiness, and damaging
your overall well being.
You can be feeling bitter and furious, frustrated,
upset and generally bad.
It can even make you feel that your whole life
is in trouble.
Finally, you become a cynic distrusting other
people’s sincerity, motives and actions.
Here are the four suggestions how you can cope
better with disillusionment, and start feeling happier.
a) Take as long as you need to realise the new
situation, and develop a comprehensive and wide
perspective on the specific issue.
Consider how much time you need to adjust your
mindset, without taking anything personally.
b) Analyse and re-evaluate your expectations,
in case they have been impossible and unrealistic.
Try to re-adjust them according to the new reality.
c) Understand and acknowledge that no matter
how disappointed you feel, that certain things are
not as you thought they were;
still it is very much better for you to be aware of
the new situation, than keep on living in an
illusion and a fantasy.
d) Decide to take immediate steps to either
change, if you can, or accept the new situation;
not only for your own personal benefit, but also
for other people concerned.
Stamp Of Approval
Many times in life the only solution to a
problem/situation is acceptance.
Acceptance is your ability to develop a positive
attitude towards that situation.
The following steps will help you learn to accept
things more easily.
1) Eliminate the uncertainty you feel about the
new situation, by examining all the facts and
proving to yourself, that this is actually the new
reality now to acknowledge.
2) Start thinking and developing a plan to include
all options you have at your disposal, in order to
deal with this new fact effectively, as well as your
own personal feelings.
3) Understand that accepting a situation is not
your personal preference;
but it is just allowing it to be as it is, without
believing that you can change it or control it in
4) Realise that acceptance will bring peace and
comfort in your life.
You will gradually get used to the new situation,
and you will not be reacting to it any more.
Finally, you will be feeling more relaxed, happy
5) Recognise that the new situation is a natural
it will open a new chapter in your life, with new
experiences and interests, as well as more knowledge
The Big Picture
Our response to disillusionment is usually, either
to withdraw within ourselves and stay away, or
to get angry and start accusing other people.
Certainly, both approaches are wrong and lead
Feel your feelings and breathe deeply to relax.
The world is not perfect, and you are not alone.
Educate yourself, show understanding and
Try to improve yourself and your life, as well as
the people around you, as much as you can.
Feel capable, competent, strong and powerful.
Good Luck !!