Tag Archive | Priorities

Backbone!

 

Hi there!

 

Bo was working in his office this afternoon when he
received an email from his colleague asking him for
assistance with his project.

As soon as he read this he felt resentful immediately,
since he knew that on the one hand he wanted to
help him, but on the other this would entail extra
time and effort for him.

Thinking more about it, he did not want to accept
this obligation, because it meant he would have to
stay in the office late, and neglect part of his own
commitments.

I have no reason to accept this other than being
helpful to a colleague, something which I can’t
afford to do at the moment he thought.

I have to say No to you this time, because I’m
extremely busy at present and I have no time
to spare for more work.
But I can recommend Jos to you, who will be pleased
to help you with your project .

Bo decided, and replied to his colleague without any
further delay.

Immediately he felt relieved and ready to continue
with his own business.

 

Yellow Flowers

 

Will Power

 

Most people dislike to say NO because they want to
help and be nice to the other person.
But saying yes all or most of the time entails a lot
of unpleasant consequences like,
    loss of valuable time,
    waste a huge amount of mental energy,
*     a great amount of pressure.

All of these result in physical and mental exhaustion.
Yet people find it so very hard to say NO.
This is happening because of many reasons like,
*     they want to avoid any arguments,
*     they want to be polite,
*     they want to fit in with the others,
*     they want to maintain good relationships,
*     they feel guilty if they do not help.

But if you really want to create your own life and
pursue your goals, you do need to be in full
control of all situations around you.

Learning to say NO is the greatest reward you can
give to yourself.
In order to be able to do so, you will need to become
decisive, confident and assertive  —  but at the same
time you must be calm and polite.

Being assertive means you must convey your message,
and at the same time to listen to the other person.
It means sharing and appreciating others.

When you manage this you will increase your
self-confidence, you will become more understanding,
you will improve your self-image and finally you
will achieve very much more.

 

Red Leafs

 

Primary Element

 

Before you decide and turn down any demands
and requests from other people, you need to
evaluate the situation.

Here are the steps you need to take:

a)     Take your time to think all requests made on
you before giving any answer.
Say you will let them know as soon as possible.
Study the demands and make certain they will
fit your own obligations and commitments.

b)     Analyze your priorities, and decide whether
the new engagement is of any significance, relevance
or magnitude to you.
If you find it is of no consequence to you, just ignore it.

c)     Consider the time length the new engagement
will need to be completed.
If it is long term, disregard it, because it will be adding
more stress on you.

d)     Refuse immediately any demand or request,
which makes you feel guilty if you do not do it.
If you accept something under these circumstances
you will feel pressed, stressed, anxious and eventually
really sick.

 

Shrubs

 

Guiding Light

 

There is no perfect way to say NO, and there is also no
way you can ever control the other person’s feelings
and reactions.

The following advice is how to do this best:

a)     Know your value as a person and have the right
attitude, independence and energy.

b)     Stand in a power pose, look calm and assertive,
and be fast and polite.

c)     Communicate your NO decision clearly and firmly,
using simple words.
Do not complicate and over-explain things.

d)     Offer an alternative solution to show your good
will and to meet half way.

e)     If at all possible and you really want to help,
offer a lesser commitment.

Do not forget, you are responsible only for
yourself,
and not for any other person’s feelings
and actions
towards you.

Nothing is perfect, including humans.
Use any criticism for your own growth.

Remember, you can not please everybody.
Never lose your self-worth.

Enjoy the long term benefits of saying NO.

 

 

 

Qui Audet Adipisciur!

 

 

 

Hello!

 

Life is full of unexpected events. Sometimes it goes
smoothly but many times it can be very difficult
and disappointing.  It is then that we will be called
upon to start all over again.

We may have to face an unforeseen divorce, a sudden
death or a surprising illness.
Building up our life all over again is a frightening
thought which fills us with anxiety.

But also it is one which gives us ground and hope
to create a new life.
These modern times we live beginning a new life again
is an everyday reality.

Although it is a frightening experience and a hard try,
it is a new way to define ourselves.

 

Yellow Rose

 

Assignments

 

Here are six simple ways to start your life again.

 

A)  Live In The Present

 

It is very easy to stay in the past because we have
already invested a big part of our lives in it.
But if we want to move on and start over, we must
leave the past where it belongs — in the past!

Keep busy with your present life and create a new you.

 

B)  Enjoy The Trip

 

Although as adults we have less time and opportunities
than the young, still we have the choice to be daring
and take some risks.

View the creation of your new self as a pleasant journey
and be thankful for what it brings to your new life.

 

C)  Trust The Conclusion

 

When we are ready to start over, we always
believe that our new life will be better than our previous
in many ways;  otherwise there is no point in
starting anything.

The opportunities are out there — we only need to find
and take advantage of them.

 

HalfWayUp

 

D)  Prioritize

 

 In order to succeed we have to put our priorities
right.  There is no way we can do everything at
the same time.

Focus on the most important things to be done
first in order to create the right flow of things.

 

E)   Bona Fide

 

We usually are stuck to what was  —  especially
the first few years after the unexpected event.
We always think what and how we used to be
and live.

Everything changes, and in order to follow we
must evolve and adapt ourselves to the new
situations.

 

F)  Defeat Struggle

 

Often when we have a difficult task to do we tend
to postpone it for indefinite periods.
By delaying taking the necessary steps to restart our
life it becomes progressively more difficult every day,
and finally it will never happen.

Start now to enjoy the life you want later.

 

Learn the lessons well, even if you have to go through fire,
and you will definitely succeed in creating your new self.
You will see and enjoy the dramatic change eventually.